Welcome
Hello there!
I’m Avi (oh-vee) and I write about managing ambition + anxiety in the pursuit of a meaningful life.
This project is what I wish I had access to when I first got serious about looking inwards, asking myself the big questions, and taking ownership over the arc of my life.
Who are you?
Growing up I was the classic bookish kid who was laser-focused on soaking up reassurance from academic and extracurricular achievement since I had no idea how to generate it from within.
One day halfway through law school I realized I had made a terrible mistake optimizing for stability and status when what I actually cared about was doing work that was meaningful to me. Unfortunately, at the time I wasn’t sure what to do with that realization other than feel paralyzed by dread.
I graduated from law school the next year and without much of a plan emptied my savings to move to San Francisco, deciding I’d give myself six months to try and break into tech and gaming. If I failed, I’d go back to the law but at least have peace of mind that I’d had the courage to shoot my shot rather than wondering ‘what if?’ for the rest of my life.
At the end of the six months (during which time I met so many incredible and generous people— I’ll always have a soft spot for the Bay Area) I failed to break in, accepted my fate, and started studying for the bar.
Although… not entirely.
As a final act of quiet rebellion I started a blog about competitive gaming, a topic close to my heart. I couldn’t work in games, I reasoned, but perhaps I could at least write about them for fun as I resumed marching down a path I knew was wrong for me.
It seemed a silly, tiny gesture at the time, but not giving up on the final ember of my dream was one of the braver (and ultimately most important) things I’ve ever done.
I can promise you it didn’t feel like it at the time, though, and I had no inkling of what was going to happen next.
My first essay got retweeted by the CEO of Riot Games. The second front-paged r/leagueoflegends. The third got me an invitation from ESPN to write a full-length feature on the esports industry.
The site spiraled upwards from there, and soon the bar exam was an afterthought.
I'll never forget getting an email from a Riot recruiter asking if I'd perhaps be interested in flying out to Los Angeles, CA to visit Riot Games HQ re: a role on the team building esports for League of Legends?
?
The rest is history. Every day since then has been a gift.
Once I figured out the professional side of my life, it was on to the personal. That’s a longer story but suffice it to say I live a life of calm confidence these days, which is a far cry from where I was even a few years ago.
I’ve still got a long way to go to reach my vision, but as I continue learning I’d love to share and offer dispatches to those on their own journeys.
Why’s it called The Aileron?
Ailerons are flight control surfaces that allow aircraft to balance and change direction, but (at least to me) work in a fascinating and somewhat unintuitive way.
I love air travel and have spent a decent chunk of my life in the sky
I appreciate fighter jets with childlike wonder
After a harsh life setback some years ago I felt aimless and unsure about when I would find a sense of purpose again. One night while scrolling aimlessly in bed I came across an MIT lecture about F-22 flight controls on YouTube. For reasons I can’t fully explain— perhaps the sheer competence of the lecturer, or the engineering marvel of the most formidable air-to-air fighter in history, or maybe just the healing properties of hearing my inner six-year-old yelling SO COOOOOL!!!! for an hour straight— watching that video reignited my sense of joyful living and nudged me back on track. One of the most important things I did in the weeks following that night was decide I wanted to create this project.
